I found new meaning in the expression "Naked and Afraid" I know it is a tv show about survival. But it also about how I approach my scale at times. I have lost 20 lbs as of today. This program is allowing me to change my relationship with food. I am looking at food less and less and I am satisfied with less of it as well. It is starting to allow me to become more honest. There is nothing magical about food and emotional eating. It is a temporary solution to a permanent problem which can be one of many things. I can make poor choices because I am bored or because I want to be nice to myself thinking I deserve a treat. I can overeat because I am sad or because I am celebrating. I think my favorite reasons for making poor choices is because I am tired. Eating keeps me awake when I ought to just go to sleep. Slowing, my food choices are coming back into line with my overall goals in life. Which is to live a healthy life of peace and well being and be of service to others.
My life has become very interesting since the beginning of the year. There are others I am helpful to in a few different respects but I am also able to honor my own limits and priorities. I have the freedom to do as I wish now too. I am enjoying being an empty nester. I got to baby sit for a few friends and family. I got to run errands for someone who was getting out of the hospital and bring her home. I go to hot yoga about 3 times a week. I see friends for lunch and go to movies- either alone with a friend. I catch up with my daughter from time to time and visit with her in Philly. I love getting photos on my smart phone from family and friends and reading Facebook too. I am very content. Both of my jobs are going extremely well.
At this moment, I am surprised at myself. Last week, I started shopping for a new Heating and A/C system because mine is over 35 years old...... as old as the house..... which I have owned for 20 plus years. I got 2 estimates. The first guy was here last Saturday so I turned off the system because it was so beautiful out. And the next day when I went to turn it back on , the fan motor said "NO THANK YOU. I AM DONE NOW". The 3 rd company is a company that I used before- Eric Levy from Elite Heating and A/C. And he is my final choice for many reasons and he won't be able to fit me in until sometime next week- He mostly does commercial work now. So I'm home tonight while it is freezing outside without any heat and I am calm. No worries. It will get fixed when it gets fixed. No anxiety.
Although I am a little uncomfortable, I am managing. It will be warmer on Sunday and next week. I only have to be cold for 36 to 48 hours I am guessing. So I will take a hot bath and I do have an electric bed warmer aka mattress pad. As always, it was good talking to you- good night and sweet dreams.
